I Miss Mayberry

If you're a part of today's world, you have come to know that the speed of "life" has been put into fast forward. Patience is no longer a virtue and I am the most important person to everyone I know... Ha! Right!

Your neighbors used to be your friends, but your friends now consist of the contact list in your cell phone and your facebook profile. Lets be honest, how often do you talk to half the people on your facebook profile? Nine out of Ten of those who have a facebook have hundreds of "friends" to keep tabs on who is doing what, when they are doing and who they invited to do it with them only to be disappointed that although they are "friends" you weren't invited to participate. And then... deleting that "friend" Really???

As I am sure that I am not the only one that has noticed a Sunday afternoon on the couch watching a movie or doing something as a family has gone by the wayside. Everyone always has to be busy doing something. Kids and teenagers don't go outside to play or hang out anymore, if their cell phones had less than 5 minutes of action, they would completely die (truthfully speaking, I know some adults the same way) or if the computer or TV were off or out of service for a day, they might just have a meltdown, they are out of touch with the rest of the world. What ever happened to the slower pace? Why do we insist of using every single minute of every single day just to say we are doing something regardless of the importance of the task at hand.. We're always busy and failing to see that what we are doing is nothing more than passing the time and then complaining we never have enough time to do what "we want" to do. We spend the spring planting the roses but yet we never take the time to stop and smell them when they bloom.

I remember growing up, our Mayberry, if you will; consisted of my aunts and uncles playing horseshoes, riding four wheelers in the 9 mile with my cousins and their cousins, walking in the woods with the entire family after Nana's wonderful nap worthy dinner just to walk, going out on the boat with Uncle Greg and Aunt Wanda, going crabbing down at the dock, and lets not forget the sound of Nascar playing on the radio in the background of each and every family event held outside in the summertime.

Modern Day reality: I was in a local store this week and the cashier was just as pleasant as she could be, in some instances overdoing it but never the less, she was doing her job to the very best of her ability. A local off duty police officer pardoned her counter, there was a line behind him and the cashier was making small talk with the gentleman. She asked him about a service she was interested in as she knew he was an businessman outside of his "day job" the small talk commenced while she was ringing him up and he needed her contact information to set up an appointment to meet with her outside of her work. While he was processing his own credit card to pay for his purchase, the cashier began to write down her contact information (all the while the woman next in line is huffing and puffing and tapping her foot, quite loudly I might add) and then the woman in line said, "of course you're gonna do that before you wait on me" - it took a matter of 2 seconds to write down her info and give to the off duty police officer - and without skipping a beat the cashier said to the woman, "Mam, I'm sorry you're having a bad day, what can I do for you today? Is this all you need today?" just as pleasant to her as she was to the customer before. Mayberry still exists but it is rarely exercised by many. This cashier was not "slow" in ringing up the police officer but she wasn't working on improving her ringing speed either, she was doing her job and interacting with the customers as her job description outlines.
Its as if we are living in the life of Marty McFly in Back to the Future part II. The faster we can get what we think we need to have, the better we like it and if the speed isn't up to par, lets complain about it and see what we can get for free for our "inconvenience". Oh please!.

Has anyone else noticed that these "modern technologies" has in fact made our lives harder rather than easier? I'm guilty too, I don't understand why adobe is so hard to install on a computer so I can send someone a PDF vs. a word document but if it's not a necessity for them to have it, it's not that hard for me to print the paper and give it to them. Although I will admit, I do tease them about technology and their rebellion against it. However, it is that very rebellion that prompted this blog and finding Mayberry again.

Toby Keith's "American Ride" is full blast... If it wasn't for those without a pound of patience to spare we would still be pushing on the old fashioned way knowing that a paper trail never lets you down unlike a computer where you can simply hit the delete button by "accident" and poof all records are gone - or are they?. Mayberry for some has in fact been put in the recycle bin and that bin has been emptied. Everyone is trying to out do each other with ideas, concepts, money, material things and no one is focusing on the outcome of what they are so quickly trying to achieve. The outcome will without a doubt be loneliness, heartache, disappointment and wonder; the wonder of what went wrong and why it worked for one but not them.
I saw a statement asking the question who was the better president, Regan or Obama... Personally, that was a stupid question for someone to even consider asking however... If Mayberry were reintroduced to the American People, our children may not be the future liars and thieves that use laziness as a disability to reap on "assistance" from the government. The government isn't assisting - You and I are, we're footing the bill each and every payday so that one day we can get a retirement that may never come. But that's another blog all in itself. If you have the opportunity take a moment to listen to the song - it's avialable on youtube, but you knew that already.

Bottom line....
Mayberry is family, true friends and a lifestyle that revolves around just that. This year, Mayberry is my goal not my resolution and there is NO app for it.

Try Not to become a Man of Success... but a Man of Value - Albert Einstein

Finally Home

I feel the need to post this blog to help my heart heal, my memories stay alive and bring closure to what may be the end of an earthly life but a beginning to a new life. This week, my Granddaddy went to heaven after 89 busy years here on earth. As I reflect on his life and the effect he had on mine, I know he loved me, I know that the man he was helped to shape me.

I recall the stories he told of his time as a young man, and the simplicity of life (although most of us today couldn't do what they did back then). The times were tough but the family ties were strong. The work was hard but in the end, the satisfaction of a hard days work and a loving family at home was worth the sweat that fell from his brow that day or the sore muscles that were awaiting him the next. The routine of his daily life never seemed to stray far from what he had always known; breakfast, read the ENTIRE newspaper and then get to work on doing something.

Growing up although I never fully understood his way of thinking, he didn't share much information but he always knew what he wanted the outcome to be, that outcome was security; security for his family, their future and his own peace of mind. He worked hard all his life, even in "retirement" he remained busy with different things only resting in the evening after the sun went down. But I know now his mind never stopped churning on what he was going to do the next day, the next week or the next month. He always had something in the works. Look in our family dictionary and look up the word Responsible - the definition is Dougie. My husband used to say that his mind needed to be placed in a glass box and only broke in case of emergency. Minds and a memory as good as his were are few and far between. He rarely forgot a name, face or person. His mind was in tacked and as sharp as it ever was up until the day he passed.

Precious Memories are all I have now of one of the greatest men I will ever know. I know he's upstairs looking down on us, watching over us all the while meeting up with old friends and family and tinkering on something while waiting to see us again. He touched many people in many different ways. He left an impression on his children, grandchildren, great grandchildren and extended family.

We love you Granddaddy and we will never forget you, your lessons, or the example you have left for us. "Thank you for coming" and sharing your life with us. We were blessed to have you and proud to call you Granddaddy. May your rest be peaceful until we meet again.



Thank you to everyone who has put up a prayer for our family, sent flowers, food, and condolences.

Tis the Season....

Merry Christmas Everyone!
This year has definitely had its ups and downs, achievements and failures, but in the end we are all thankful for what we have, who we can call our friends, and the love of our family and their support.

I have found it hard to get into the Christmas spirit this year (the decorating, the shopping, and the effort it all requires) but have not found it hard to get into the spirit of Christmas and it's real meaning. The economy may have our wallets begging for a refill, let us not forget the real celebration of the season. Jesus and his birth, our families and what we need - not what we want.

I have all I need this Christmas. I have the love of my husband, a healthy daughter, a supportive family, the best of friends and the most precious pet on the planet. We may not have an extravagant Christmas this year no thanks to our drowning economy (I was so positive up to this point - darn)

Bottom Line - Christmas is a time of reflection of your values, giving thanks to God for the love of your family, the support of your friends and all of your worldly possessions. Be Thankful for those who love you without question just as you are. I am... I don't need materials to feel loved.

May God bless each of you this Christmas -
Merry Christmas friends, family and all who read this and
Happy New Year!

Enough is Enough

This blog entry is difficult for me to submit for numerous reasons, but mainly letting you in on what I've been battling with within myself.

Enough is Enough.....I've had just about enough of many things going on in my life. If you were in my brain right now you would understand. See... I am a stubborn and strong willed, determined and hell bent woman when it comes to some decisions in my life - how I handle them reflects not only on my parents, but also has an impact on my daughter and how she may handle a similar situation when she's older.

Circumstances that prompted this blog is based on the song by Rodney Adkins - "if you're going thru hell" and Darryl Worley's "sounds like life to me" - a combination of the two if you will.

Right now "I'm going thru hell" in my own skin and being told that "it sounds like life" and it will work out like it's supposed to. Is it a mid life crisis I ask myself? No.... I'm too young for a mid life crisis. I used to be happy with me, happy with my decisions, no regrets, headstrong and well just a female version of a rebel.

I know what I have to do to get "me" back but listening to advice of others especially when I didn't ask for it just makes me feel that much more depressed, because I know they are right. I am well aware that I used to be a happy... always a smiling person. I didn't take too many things to heart but as I've gotten older - I find myself getting upset, irritated and just plain mad about things I used to let roll off my back, while at the same time trying as hard as I can to be strong and steadfast for the sake of not showing my weaknesses to my daughter so that perhaps she will be strong and steadfast should she experience this very thing I am experiencing within myself now.

But... I can't help but wonder if how I am handling it is wrong. Who is to say it's wrong? Who is to say it's right? All I know is I need my happy back... I'm working on it day by day and doing the best I can to work with myself to bring me back to where I need to be - a good mother, wife, daughter, sister and friend. For all that have been worried about me, know this... I am fine, I will be fine and I am taking steps to return to my former self instead of this depressed individual I have become.

Enough is enough

How Rude!

You know when I was growing up, people seemed to be a lot nicer and a whole lot more considerate... Today.... Not so much...

My daughter fell over the weekend and we thought that she broke her ankle, Thankfully it is NOT broken but.... she does have to use crutches for the week. The kids at school seem to be so unwilling to help her, she does have a ton and a half book bag. Teachers inconsiderate by not letting her out so she doesn't get ran over by other students while she's having to carry all her things AND walk with crutches... Then, as I am helping her get to the car at the end of the day, I ask two students before us to "hold the door please" what do they do.....???? Let it slam in her face.... Really? Come on!

Whatever happened to EVERYONE being equally important and people helping people? Long gone out and the window I guess. What has this world come to - rudeness everywhere you go? One day you may be on crutches or injured and in need of help and perhaps you will see what I'm talking about. The ONLY person who held the door for her was the Sheriff's deputy assigned to the school as a resource officer.

Kids without proper upbringing to be polite or considerate, their parents need their own asses beat and taught manners. Apparently they have no sense of responsibility of leadership to their children. Everyone is equal, no one person is better than the other regardless of clothing, appearance, acne, socail butterflies or those who chose to be silent and to themselves.

I guess what knocks us down when we get up without help, makes us stronger. But it is always nice to know that you can find out "who your friends are" when you're down in the valley and you're looking up because you feel you can't go any other way but up

Who is really right?

Ok 2 blogs in 1 day man I seem to be on a roll after over a year of no posts at all...

My brain has been buzzing over a concept regarding the North Carolina Department of Socail Services and Foster Parents... It has always been my thought that the DSS intervenes in a situation where a child or children are in a neglect or abusive situation and place them in care of foster family or another family member until the situation at hand is resolved (unfortunatley resolution is not always a factor the child/children are kept in the "system" for years until they are "of age" to "take care" of themselves)... Aparently some people just take things way too far and those who work for the "system" and those who "foster" come head to head on the well being of the child/children in care of one or the other.

Personally I could not be a foster parent not because I don't care but because I care too much, I become attached too much.. I want to fix what's broken and I put my whole heart into it and more often than not find that my help is too much or not enough.

I read this article and was shocked to find that DSS would revoke the license of a foster parent for "caring too much" by saying what needed to be said and apparently it was not what DSS wanted to hear. This foster family according to what I read was more than willing to take the child for a second time (after the child was removed at the request of the foster parents for the child taking things to the limit and being an unrully teenager) Since leaving this foster family, the child has been replaced and then removed from another family or two and now sits in Jail (for messing up too many times) to avoid going back to custody of DSS. This child wants to return to the foster family she left in the first place as since leaving learned many valuable lessons and says they want to change; which is what the first foster family was trying to help this child do in the first place.

I guess I have a question... does this particular social worker who has a "degree" in child phycoligy have children? Does this social worker really know what is in the best interest of a child, teenager etc.?

In today's society there are so many children in care of the state for whatever reason; some ligitamet some not. We're not "allowed" to disapline our children in public or some are fearful of disiplining their children in public because there may be that one person who thinks it is abuse vs. disapline and report that parent to DSS and totally disrupt a family's life. Personally spankings when I was little made me who I am today... I was fortunate to have a family that loves me dispite my flaws and I am so thankful that I can provide my child with that same lifestyle.

Bottom line... Children will test you, teenagers will push your buttons and even when they are adults (so I'm told) they will continue to rattle your cage from time to time... How you raise them matters, what you teach them when they're little will carry through. I am a big believer that children are truly a gift, don't destroy them... teach them, love them, provide a safe haven for them and they will show you thanks in return... There are entirely too many children in the "system" for whatever reason, they are being brainwashed that they aren't wanted by their "real" parents otherwise they wouldn't be where they are and making them travel from one home to another with nothing more than a food lion bag of clothes. - Then.... the child does everything in his/her power to rebel and that only makes things worse because "they aren't wanted". When they actually get in society, how are these children going to be as adults, has the "system" done all it can to make sure these children have a successful adulthood after being in the "system" or do these kids carry the same attitude they had grown to know?

Sorry to go off on a tangent but that really got under my skin and at the same time realize how thankful I am that I didn't have to grow up in the "system" and neither will my child.

Growing up and growing older

Hello all

It has been a LONG time since I blogged but thanks to Carla reminded me that we do have blogs - I figured I'd join in and update my blog as well.

Lizzie turned 14 over the summer, we were fortunate enough to be able to take her to the best place on earth - Disney World for her birthday, we all had a blast. She is now a freshman in high school - man I'm getting old, walking thru the halls at Dixon during orientation before school started reminded me of just how old I am and it also reminded me that change is not always a bad thing, I am pleased to report that there are more resourses available for the children - oops - young adults (teenagers)thanks to the rise in technology and grants received they have finally been put to good use.

Lizzie has had a love for horses forever and most of you know that she has been a frequent rider since she was 8. These photos are of her on Echo. She still loves the thrill of a good ride or the leisure of takin' it easy on a trail. I can report that she can text and talk while riding so all is well in that department, she calls it the best of both worlds. She hasn't participated in a show (barrel racing) in over a year but is currently training for upcoming Western Pleasure shows.

In other news... well there isn't that much to tell, we are living life, loving most parts of it, and laughing as much as we can.